Special American Idol Announcement. Finally, someone listens to the viewers.

The Pond has no idea how it became a repository for the the excited, the disillusioned, the angry and the amused.

All of them snorting the Angeleno Marching Powder that is American Idol.

Therefore, by popular (as well as unpopular) demand, invocation, intimidation and threat, I will be giving my highly human and healthily-considered verdict straight after the show.

When I say ‘straight after the show’, I mean straight after a glass of the exquisite Honig Cabernet Sauvignon.

I will be holding it throughout the show in one hand, only releasing it to grab a remote with a huge mute button at appropriate junctures.

Because of the Pond’s location on the Left Coast of the World I will be functioning on Pacific Standard Time.

I know this will inconvenience Right-Coasted supplicants (especially those on the right coast of certain Finnish islands) but, please believe me, I am only doing my best here to uphold the true meaning of entertainment and will write as quickly as I can.

I am already concerned at what might have transpired in terms of song choice between my last post and tonight.

Will two contestants try and sing the same song? Two “Sweet Caroline”s is a double-header of which not many of us could stomach eighteen innings.

Ratings have continued to plummet like Mike Tyson’s pants. And Roger Clemens’ credibility.

So what controversy will be manufactured to heighten the public’s sensibility?

Perhaps Paula will pass out.

Perhaps Simon Cowell will wear a yellow shirt.

Perhaps Randy will say ‘cat’ rather than ‘dog.’

I look forward to this artistic experiment. (At least on my part.)

I can only hope you will give me your unvarnished and, as always, aesthetic reactions.

And I would make it clear that I have never had a relationship with Mindy McCready.

Although I did once listen to one of her CDs on a plane.

The Pond thanks exfordy for a memorable visualization of contemporary entertainment.



Filed under Uncategorized

2 responses to “Special American Idol Announcement. Finally, someone listens to the viewers.

  1. ScandinavianBlonde

    Only a mute button to save you?

    I had the luxury of a fast forward button, rarely have I appreciated it more.

    A tag for the wine, aren’t you afraid that you condemn it by associating it with AI? Or is it a ploy so that it won’t sell out in your liquor store?

    Those are some insidious, I’m sorry amphibious tactics..

  2. thespine11

    But, but, how could you have seen it already?

    You’re in the wilds of Finland.

    The Honig is an especially fine organic cabernet from Napa.

    I really do pay to drink it.

    Perhaps some Finnish fisherman will bring it to you one day?

    Or maybe Jari can bring you a case back in his way from another failed trip to London….

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